distraction

sometimes....
all we need is a
beautiful distraction

home

theres no place like home...
theres no place like home...
theres no place like home...

stone cutter

Hammering away at our souls

Wave after wave of existence

We must take up the chisel

And place it

HDReader

only the ashes

it is the ones that spontaneously combust within us...
and burn us to the ground,
leaving only the ashes with which to rebuild..
ah yes....
it is those loves that will live inside us forever....

selfishness

she feels at times
what she calls selfishness
was purely evil....

the afterlife

when bad things happen to good people

what makes you think this isn't the after life????

empty

EMPTY...

Lying naked and exposed

My very self probed and examined

My soul declared barren

My dreams slowly shattered

…still some embers stubbornly flicker

-- Random Magus

defilement

defiling ones self,,,
is no longer an acceptable form,
of punishment

worry

so the circle begins... worry plunges into
its funneling, twirling, twisting, dance
as it sucks one deeper and deeper
into oneself leaving off, only
at the entry to the
pit 0f despair
*********
*******
*****
***
**
*

outside

it is with increasing difficulty,,,
that i venture into the world...
outside......

waters edge

you come in waves..
part you,
part me,
part fantasy....

they are more peaceful waves now,
they no longer dash me upon the shore..
leaving me breathless and broken..
more the ebb than the flow...

leaving me, just, alone....
at the waters edge....
on the surface,
hard and cold... like smooth, wet sand...

Powerless to Hate

You tear me at times

I try to run away

you fill me with rage

you turn to ashes all my smiles

make all meaning cease to exist

crumble my castle even as I build

...you make the world disappear in a haze

till all i see is red

all the colours distorted

all the joy swallowed

you make my heart beat so fast

my body clenched

my temples throbbing

you make me repeat your name

even as I turn to run

You know where to follow me

in my most secret place

--- Random Magus

on god

if there is a god.......
why doesn't he want me to believe???

... a fleeting thought captured

All creation comes with pain.

Why I wonder?

Do you see pain as noble?

Do you think without pain can't come wisdom?

Is pain essential to survival ?

Essential to success?

Do you have the answer?

Have you been through pain?

Have you felt superior because of your pain?

Have you felt wise and looked down on me because of your newfound depth?

Depth that came through pain?

Or can you laugh at the world exultant at your victory?

Your defiance of pain!

Your joy at small things!

Your gratitude to be alive!

Your laughter, your smiles!

Your marvel at the gift of your breath!

- Random Magus

letting go

i visited you last night in a dream...
you were fine..
you had moved on..

i saw the house where you lived..
the woman that loved you...

you didn't need me...
it was as if i had never let you down....

each night

each night,,,,
you come to me,,,
and beckon me to join you....

each morning,,,
i must find the resolve to stay......

Just the pureness of an ephereal moment?

Can you pinpoint the moment you were happy – truly happy?

Can you even remember it?

And what is happiness

A sense of possibility?

Of omnipotence and potential?

A promise of things to come?

Do we analyze it so much...

.. that we miss the moment?

Can that be happiness?

Just moments?

Amber Azam-Kureshi

visionless words

tangled in visionless words.........

color

as if a glimmer of light had somehow found its way.......

color has returned to my world

All that I Am.

So much change on the Outside.

All the same Inside.

Is the line so clear,

As I dance back and forth?

Do I dare step over?

All that I Am.

Oh, I can be so much more.

Here it is Safe.

I watch the rest, knowing it could be me.

I will teach my children better.

Is it too late?

The Sun shines through sometimes.

T.G.

create,,, i shall

and create i shall,,
oft' times dirges,, sometimes useful bits...
it pours from me,, thick and syrupy,,,
lifes blood exposed too long to the air..........

part of me

i have succeeded in destroying the part of me,,,
even you couldnt touch.........

tattered soul

as i peer out,, on the autumn of my life,,, i realize...
my tattered soul...is the common denominator of every relationship i have ever had.....

i need to know

just one more thing........
did you ever really love me????

hiding place

have you,, at last,, found a safe place to hide????

up in flames

"I don't know what's going to happen, but I want to have my kicks before the whole shithouse goes up in flames." -Jim Morrison

T.G.

its so easy

the love of my life, was violent with me...

he was fascinated by dominance, manipulation, and violence in his choices of music, entertainment, and lifestyle,, and i believe it all just bled over...

he is gone now... but when i hear songs like "Its So Easy" by Guns N' Roses,,, and the words are in part...


"See me hit you
You fall down....

Ya get nothin' for nothin'
If that's what ya do
Turn around bitch I got a use for you
Besides you ain't got nothin' better to do
And I'm bored....."

i cannot help but romanticize it...
his violence was his most intense emotion,,,,
and that is what i miss.....

waiting for you

it is your turn to "come get me........"